Dan Calabrese

Dan Calabrese

Articles by Dan Calabrese:

With Scalia dead, there's only one course of action for Senate Republicans

No. I knew the news was big when I got a message from Rob over my phone that consisted of nothing but "Holy S***!" And it was. Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia is dead at 79, and not only has America lost one of the finest public servants in its entire history - a man who understood the Constitution and was ... continue reading

Cruz campaign blows it by pulling ad starring one-time sort-porn actress

Today she's a conservative Christian - like Cruz - and that's a group that believes in redemption. This is one of the reasons I hate politics. And yes. I do. A story like this takes us about as far as we can get from anything that actually matters, and it gives the idiot media something to talk about instead of ... continue reading

Trump has gigantic lead, 36-19, over Cruz in new South Carolina poll

Yuge. Question for everyone who figures it's just a matter of time before Trump implodes and a "serious" candidate takes control in the Republican nomination race: Er, when exactly should we look for this to happen? Because I suppose this new Opinion Savvy poll of South Carolina could be way off, but that's not ... continue reading

Bernie to Hillary: Hey, you're the one who ran against Obama, not me

How dare you criticize Precious? Quick quiz: Which living Democrat former president not from Georgia once said Obama's entire persona was a big fairy tale? Bonus: He said it at a time when his wife was desperate to land a blow on the guy because her expected presidential coronation was going down in flames. Any ... continue reading

Baseball to outlaw most takeout plays at second base

And many of you will say it's the "further wussification of sports." And you'll be wrong. When baseball outlawed most home plate collisions and I wrote approvingly of the change, a lot of you took me to task for backing what you saw as the "further wussification of sports" because violent, bone-jarring crashes ... continue reading

Carly Fiorina's out; here's hoping she doesn't disappear

The right stuff. If there's one thing that convinces me beyond a doubt that American politics has gone completely off the rail, it's this: There's all this talk about the possibility of the first woman president, but the woman being taken seriously for this possibility is Hillary Clinton and not Carly Fiorina. ... continue reading

Christie's out

Out of options. I eagerly await James Taranto's bye-ku on this one. In a certain respect I think Christie gets a bad rap from conservatives, but we'll get to that in a second. A governor who became a quick sensation for his willingness to lay it to public employee unions was unable - like all his fellow governors ... continue reading

New Hampshire: Bernie bazooks Hillary; Trump wins big as Rubio falls to fifth

When socialists dance. Let's start with the Democrats. That's more fun. The doddering, wild-eyed socialist was expected to beat the entitled liar, but this was quite the beating: Bernie 60 percent; Hillary 38 percent. Now yeah, it was expected that Bernie would win New Hampshire considering he's from next-door ... continue reading

VIDEO: Hitler reacts to the Doritos baby commercial

The tweet is our hope. I had thought before today that these "Hitler reacts" videos long ago jumped the shark just because it was so easy to apply them to absolutely anything. But just because you can do it doesn't mean you can do it well, and that takes us to today. Behold the true elevation of a genre, my ... continue reading

CIA declassifies hundreds of UFO investigations, calls them 'X-Files'

Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man. It has to be this way, doesn't it? Somewhere in the dark corner of an office in Langley, Virginia, a man sits in the shadows puffing away at a cigarette, shepherding all the information Americans can never know that contains the truth about extraterrestrials, their vists to ... continue reading

Madeleine Albright: There's a special place in Hell for women who don't support Hillary

We'll take our chances. Would it be taking this whole thing way too seriously if I bothered to correct the horrendous theology? I think so. It's not so much that the threat of eternal damnation is alluded to here. That's just Madeleine Albright being a presumptuous blowhard. But I do think she's trying to do ... continue reading

NARAL (the lovely abortion people) rips Doritos for 'humanizing fetuses' in Super Bowl ad

Someone's uptight, all right. Chances are you saw the ad unless you had gotten up to get more Doritos. Then again, maybe you're one of those weird people who does your business during the game and sits down to watch the ads. Anyway, just in case you missed it, here you go: For the record, I thought this may have ... continue reading

Hillary: Halt all fossil fuel extraction on federal lands

Go big or go home. If you enjoyed paying $1.59 a gallon for gas this past weekend, understand a few things. To the extent domestic production affects this, the oil industry is mostly gettings its resources on private lands. That's because Obama, while he's happy to take credit for the increased productivity and ... continue reading

Whoa: Iowa might not be over after all

More errors surface, Dems revising the totals. Are you telling him there's a chance? I'm not sure it's enough to make Bernie the winner, but then again when you only lost by four delegates out of nearly 1,400, it wouldn't take that much, would it? Party Chairwoman Andy McGuire the day after Monday's caucuses ... continue reading

Martin Shkreli hits new heights of douchebaggery in congressional testimony

And appears pretty pleased with himself for it. What I don't get is Shkreli's end game. I understand arrogance. I understand cocky dudes who think they're too cool for everyone and everything. At some point we've probably all known douchenozzles like this guy - in our private lives. What I don't get is where he ... continue reading

Hillary: I don't 'exemplify the establishment' because I'm a woman

OK. I guess she just plays this card whenever she can't think of anything else to say, which is some combination of two things: 1. Her own lack of intelligence; 2. Her lack of confidence in yours. Yeah, this'll shut 'em up! There's no way to respond to this! Because surely you know, the establishment has no ... continue reading